Here's my entry:
The sun was painting the morning sky as I opened my eyes. I have left a chapter of my life a few hours ago and was starting to write another one. I stayed still in bed, I didn't know what to feel about it. "It's your birthday today!," my brain kept shouting at me. Almost commanding me to get up and jump around, because it is indeed my birthday today... But I can't. I closed my eyes again.
I opened my eyes, I didn't know how much time passed since then. Maybe a minute or two, maybe half or an hour, I didn't know. I looked at Steven who's sleeping soundly beside me, noticed I stole the blankets again and smile at the thought of him saying I'm a blanket stealer. I traced his face in the air, not touching his face. I didn't want to wake him up because I know we'll be playing or cuddling when he wakes up. Not that I didn't want that, I'm just enjoying the melancholic joy I was feeling that time. Besides, I can't afford to let him see my sad eyes. He said my eyes were expressive and he knows what my mood is just by looking at it. He moved. I closed my eyes immediately, pretending to be asleep. He held me close to him and I almost shed a tear. Usually, I turn my back to him before he wakes up so he won't see me crying a little. But I didn't have time for that so I have no choice to conceal the feels inside me. You see, I knew even before that being in a long distance relationship is difficult but I didn't know it was that difficult. Thinking that the next few days you'll be away with each other again was kind of a torture I least wanted for my birthday.
I opened my eyes and smile at Steven who was looking at me. Cuddled, talked and played. We continued our day watching The Walking Dead, How I Met Your Mother and Stand-up Comedies.
Night came, we went outside to have a walk around the park and mall. We also bought Jamaican Patties becaiuse I was craving. Haha! It was fun and very romantic, he held me very close to him, we laughed and joked around. When we went back the condo we started cooking our special dinner!
Our Special Tuna Ragu Capellini with Jamaican Patty!!!
This is a secret recipe! Hahaha! It was very yummy!!!
Mom's Bicol Express!!!
We took out some Bicol Express from mom and we mixed it with pasta too! It's very yummy!
Iced Tea
All hungry and giddy!
My Handsome Fiance ;)
After eating our dinner we slow danced to our favorite songs ♥ I always wanted to have an intimate slow dance and he made it happen! I was really happy that time but at the same time I was sad, knowing that we only had a few days left. This time I wasn't able to hold myself and cried in his chest as we danced, he stopped and held me for awhile. He called me a few times and tried to lift my face up, but I didn't care. I just wanted to hug him and never let him go. It was the time when I let go of all the pain I was feeling. Don't get me wrong, I really love him and this pain is nothing compared to the happiness that he gives me. But pain is pain. It demands to be felt even if we don't want to.
After awhile, I listened to Steven and let him pull my head up. "Baby.." he said,
"Mahal kita baby," he said
I smiled.
"Masaya at maswerte ako dahil.. kasama kita." He continued
Even with my face covered in tears, I smiled.
"Tayo ay awesome, tayo ay legendary! Kapag nasa US na ako, miss na miss na miss namiss kita, at iniisip kita lagi," He continued talking
I started crying again and laughed at the same time. I can't believe he's speaking tagalog!
"Gusto ko magkaroon ng dalawampung bata sa iyo, kasama kang tumanda"
I laughed out loud when he said this, still crying. I didn't know that he was preparing for this, the lines were familiar! lol
"Mahal na mahal kita. Ikaw ang lahat sa akin.."
"Love.."
He kneeled down on one knee, holding my hand. My eyes and mouth went wide! I don't know how wide but I was really surprised!
"Love, wala akong ring... Pero, marry mo ko?"
I wanted to laugh because of the mix of tagalog words and american accent and the truly understandable grammatically incorrect sentences but I was too surprised to do that. We stayed like that for awhile, my eyes still wide and my mouth dropped open while he was still down in one knee waiting for my answer. I finally found my voice "Yes, ofcourse yes!" and hugged him tight!
Steven's Cheat Sheet that was hidden in the bathroom lol!
I still can't believe we were engaged already! I honestly didn't thought I was too young to be engaged. It doesn't matter, all I know is when you found the love that's worth all the pain and hardships. You fight for it and you keep fighting for it. I was scared of being judged by my friends and relatives, and other people. I know i'll be judged because I'm young, but it doesn't matter. Because I know that love isn't a playground, nor a place to practice. It's not about hunting and throwing away. You found a gem that perfectly fits you, you keep it. Even if others shine the brightest, it'll look dull because you're focusing on the gem you have. And for you, it's the best. ♥
