Filipino Tradition: Pamamanhikan

"The (often awkward) meeting of two families

The blueprints of wedding plans are drawn or made known during this occasion. The pamanhikan is often hosted by the bride’s family as the groom and his folks visit them to formally ask their daughter’s hand in marriage and discuss plans for the upcoming wedding over lunch or dinner. This can be an uneasy situation if it’s the first time for both parties to meet. The soon-to-weds may feel a little awkward (nervous even) seeing and listening to their parents consult each other on matters like their wedding budget, guest list and the like.

It is customary that the visiting family bring a gift (often, the best home-cooked specialty of the groom’s mom) for the hosts. Others may opt to hold the meeting on neutral grounds (a restaurant is a likely choice) or invite a mutual acquaintance to the gathering and help ease the awkwarness of the first meeting. Why do Pinoys bother with all the trouble? We all seek our parents’ blessings for a happy and trouble-free marriage. Afterall, pamanhikan is a treasured Filipino heritage which, first and foremost, avoids the embarrassing situation of having the parents see each other as strangers come wedding day."


- W@W Article

I know that this is too old-fashioned and some of the couples that are planning to get married might not be doing this anymore. And in our case, I knew this isn't possible since our family is like, half-of-the-world apart. Haha!

The thought came in while I was looking at w@w, this was just a recent topic and I wondered... Do I really want a Pamamanhikan?

I was born and raised in the Philippines and as a Filipina, I do want a Pamamanhikan. But with our set-up, I don't think it is possible. I just want that Steven would someday ask my parents for my hand, and I'll ask his parents for his hand too! Hahaha!

I know, it's given that we're getting married, and we're going to build a life together. Our parents knows that already, but wouldn't it be nice if they were asked in person? :)

I'm hoping that maybe, someday in the future it'll happen.